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    The Dissolution of Marriage is typically filed with in county in which the filing spouse lives.(California Code - Sections: 297, 298, 2320, 2339) Dissolution of the marriage or legal separation of the parties may be based on either of the following grounds, which shall be pleaded generally: (a) Irreconcilable differences, which have caused the irremediable breakdown of the marriage.If the therapist is good but resists the words narcissist and narcissism, call it emotional and verbal abuse. This gives him time to drain the bank accounts, change documents. That way, even if you do not hire them, neither can your spouse. The more prepared, calm and efficient you are, the more the attorney will respect you. If that’s too late, then begin getting support group together.When you hire a lawyer, do not tell your spouse immediately. Emotion and long stories are not liked by attorneys. It is never too late to hire evaluators or therapists for your side.

    Debts incurred by either spouse after the date of separation but before entry of a judgment of dissolution of marriage or legal separation of the parties shall be confirmed as follows: (a) Debts incurred by either spouse for the common necessaries of life of either spouse or the necessaries of life of the children of the marriage for whom support may be ordered, in the absence of a court order or written agreement for support or for the payment of these debts, shall be confirmed to either spouse according to the parties' respective needs and abilities to pay at the time the debt was incurred.

    Often the abuser who sees he is losing control will escalate the methods of control and abuse.

    The lies will be bolder and he may manipulate with more intensity. Continued use of the legal system may now be available to him.

    The legal system is adversarial and full of men and women with tremendous needs for power. You need financial assets to protect yourself and your children. Interview attorneys and make a plan before you tell your spouse what you are doing. The verbal abuser becomes enraged when faced with a partner who has found the power to leave and feels justified in his behavior.

    We are dealing with narcissists who are already damaged and primed to do battle. He or she may want to punish you and this can go on for a very long time.

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