The first is care, demonstrating active concern for the recipient's life and growth.The second is responsibility, responding to his or her expressed and unexpressed needs (particularly, in an adult relationship, emotional needs). " "We're choosing to love him," her mother explained, "because love is a choice." There's no better wisdom Susan's mother could have imparted to her before marriage. "Mom," she said hesitantly, "I really appreciate your feelings, but, in all honesty, how can you say you love someone you've never met?It’s a great part of relationships – it’s the part that makes us grow as people. if you can live with the relationship exactly as it is right now… It’s funny, but a lot of the time relationship conflicts happen because one person has an idea or vision in their head and their partner has no idea of what the other one’s “image” of the relationship is.You figured that you would eventually move in together. Regardless of what vision you had in your head of how you think things should be or could be eventually, he’s not looking for that to be the reality right now. And instead of giving each other trust and space, the one with the “image” or “vision” of how the relationship “should” be just starts freaking out and attacking their partner for not “getting it”. Do I stay with the man I love more than anything in this world?This may sound like a downer statement, but it really isn’t.
Now at this point, it would be really easy for a girl to get really upset and think there’s no future. See things exactly as they are at this exact moment and don’t make it into a problem for yourself. I’m not talking about something that you think is worth coercing him for.
I could be wrong, but I have the impression that you’re not at that point yet.
And when it comes to a relationship, you need to accept all of the person – you can’t pick and choose what parts of him you want to accept and which you don’t.
Consciously or unconsciously, they believe love is a sensation (based on physical and emotional attraction) that magically, spontaneously generates when Mr. If love comes from appreciating goodness, it needn't just happen ― you can make it happen. This man naturally saw the good in others, and our being there said enough about us that he could love us.
And just as easily, it can spontaneously degenerate when the magic "just isn't there" anymore. Love is the attachment that results from deeply appreciating another's goodness. After all, most love stories don't feature a couple enraptured with each other's ethics. God created us to see ourselves as good (hence our need to either rationalize or regret our wrongdoings). Nice looks, an engaging personality, intelligence, and talent (all of which count for something) may attract you, but goodness is what moves you to love. Just focus on the good in another person (and everyone has some). I was once at an intimate concert in which the performer, a deeply spiritual person, gazed warmly at his audience and said, "I want you to know, I love you all." I smiled tolerantly and thought, "Sure." Looking back, though, I realize my cynicism was misplaced.