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    Remember: If a bachelor has a steady job and is reasonably well-groomed and moderately attractive, then he has women approaching him at the gym, at work, contacting him first on POF and e Harmony, and generally showing him attention.

    He may be surrounded by a near-harem of female "helpers."When a man is used to being guided and micromanaged by women, it can become a behavioral pattern that is both comfortable for him and hard to break.

    (I like smart, nerdy, shy guys so much, I married one.) It's not surprising: these men tend to be quiet leaders — successful and widely respected.

    There is an art to dating introverted men, though, and this article will help you decide if this personality type is your best match.

    Relationships that start out with this dynamic never really recover, and as months and years pass, you may find yourself in a sexless "just friends"/ roommate arrangement.

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    But if you admire a man with a more subtle style, you have to be careful not to overwhelm him with your eagerness, or nudge him into "going along" passively with your agenda.

    You won’t get caught up in go-nowhere entanglements or affairs with unavailable men. And once you’re on a date, make sure you show him your most feminine, vulnerable qualities.

    The best way to deal with an introvert is to match his interest. The inexperienced man is very often a diamond in the rough and will make a wonderful partner in the long run.

    That may seem like a disappointing result at first, but it's a powerful gift in the long run. Study my flirting tips if you want to know how to enchant a man who tends toward a more subtle, quiet personality.

    Since you’re not approaching men (by asking for their help or inviting them for coffee), the rules will help you avoid players and pick-up artists as well as looky-loos—dudes who stare at you or flirt or “favorite” your online profile, but who never actually ask you out. You don't need to pretend to be an introvert in order to attract one. WAIT until he asks you out – don’t make the first move.

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