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    “If you have a friend who has a great relationship with her ex, talk to her and ask her what advice she has.” Many people have unrealistic expectations about whether they can afford to buy out their partner’s share in the home.Talk to someone who can give you a sense of what your house is worth.

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    “There’s a certain peace of mind that comes from having explored counselling,” says Caroline Felstiner, a Toronto-based divorce mediator.

    Some people are reluctant to reach out to a lawyer, notes Felstiner, because they’re worried it feels too much like pulling the trigger on their marriage.

    “But getting information isn’t the same as acting on it,” she says.

    “If you’re going to go through all the work of a divorce, you should get some personal growth out of it,” she says.

    “It’s almost like a waste of a divorce if you don’t, because, really, do you want to just repeat the same problems all over again with someone else? If you still have feelings for your spouse, a couples therapist may be able to help.

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